An Eulogy for French Fry

My dearest French Fry, it feels like just yesterday you entered our lives. Price came home so excited with you, Chicken Nuggets, and Pizza.

I was immediately protective of you since you were the only female. I had to keep rescuing you from Chicken Nuggets who kept jumping into your tank. I immediately decided to break the rules and allow the 2 men to see each other; pizza was not as aggressive and didn't try to constantly attack you. I am thinking Chicken Nuggets thought you were his perfect companion. But no means no, and us women have to stick together - so I broke up the party.

When your grandfather bought you home, I immediately told him you would not become my responsibility. I refused to add feeding fish and cleaning their tanks to my list of responsibilities. He would have to oversee these things.

Thank goodness for your great-grandmother - she fed you diligently twice a day AND when they all went on vacation, I had no choice but to give you some food. In, case you were wondering, your food made my fingers stink.

Your great-grandfather always ensured you had light throughout the day - although I heard you, Pizza, and Chicken Nuggets would sometimes have something to say about the bed time he imposed. But you know how it is...his house, his rules.

Your tank was pretty cool. BUT it wasn't cleaned often and we could see you begin to struggle. Pizza also lost his vibrant orange color. I told your grandfather to clean it, but then your filter broke. And you guys were forgotten outside of your grandmother feeding you.

I am unsure if the news will be relayed to Price or if French Fry 2.0 will suddenly appear before he returns. However, your grandfather is getting a replacement tank for your friends Pizza and Chicken Nuggets. Let's hope they can fight through until they are released from their murky homes.